Senior Thesis Defense (updated with video link and abstract)

 Genevieve completed a nearly year long senior project by defending her thesis in front of a panel of three teachers.  She wrote her thesis stating that women complement men in such a way that redeems society using Saint Pope John Paul the Great's proposed four feminine characteristics.  These are generosity, receptivity, sensitivity, and maternity.  The texts she used were The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis, The Odyssey by Homer, and Antigone by Sophocles.  She wrote a 20 page paper with multiple character analyses to defend her thesis.  

Genevieve's Abstract:

The genius of women is just as necessary as the genius of men but in a different and complementary way. When not constrained by prejudice, women are able to use their unique abilities and virtues to provide a balance to society. The women of ancient times particularly struggled with overcoming said prejudices in order to aid humanity by following God’s (or the gods’) plan for them. Penelope, Antigone, and Lucy Pevensie are three examples of women who overcame perversities in order to fulfill their roles in serving humanity.

She did an outstanding job surrounded by an audience of family and friends.  We are so proud of her!  This senior year is going by all too quickly though.  This was her last big thing that had been hanging over her head.  The rest is mostly just fun stuff like the senior retreat, prom, and the senior banquet before graduation.

Her closest friends!  She is loved by a great group of girls!

Here is the link to the video of her defense.

You'll Shine

"Sometimes I see you stuck

For such a long time

A daily nothing new

Pretend I don′t mind

With lists of things you'll never do

Until somehow you do

And you do — you do — you shine"

-Song from Rachel Coleman "Baby Signing Time"

We all have constant "Baby Signing Time" songs in our heads because that is Roman's playlist in the car.  This song in particular really gets me these days. I have a new found compassion for biological mothers of kids and adults with Down syndrome. First, I want to explain why I say "biological moms." It's because I'm an adoptive mom, and I very deliberately chose this life. I knew it was going to be hard. I knew Roman would require extra patience, that he'd be perpetually behind in milestones, that he'd likely have medical problems, and that all my experience as a mom wouldn't fully prepare me for this new world of therapies, ARDs, and IEPs. Biological mothers think they're going to have a typical baby for at least some amount of their pregnancy. They get a diagnosis handed to them that they didn't ask for. Every pregnant mom wants a healthy "normal" baby. Every mom wants their baby to meet and beat those milestones. They want their baby to be the smartest and most attractive.  I was one of these moms before I was an adoptive mom.
 

Last week I had a tour of a private preschool that has a 50:50 ratio of inclusion for kids with special needs. I'm trying to figure out where Roman will best thrive next year. I walked in for the tour and they "needed" me to fill out a developmental checklist. I immediately bristled inside. I resisted and gave some push back because sometimes people try to tell me I have to do something and it turns out they just want me to do it and will back down if I question them. Why didn't I want to fill out this form? First of all, I was wearing Roman and he's known for grabbing at anything that I'm trying to write and moving his face right in front of my face as I try to see around him. We have to fill out papers at the doctor all the time and this is not an easy feat when I am wearing him on my front. But most importantly, it is so darn depressing to check the "rarely/never" box next to a list of age appropriate milestones so many times. I mentioned above that I knew Roman wouldn't reach milestones on time. I knew it; I know it now. I chose it. And it is still a gut punch. I don't get it. Maybe I thought I'd love him in a more objective way, that I'd be able to look at this rationally and not so emotionally. My heart though.  It cries out for my boy, "I'm so sorry, buddy, that this is all so hard for you. I'm sorry every accomplished task is followed up by a list of new tasks for you to learn. I'm sorry we are always pushing you. I'm so sorry, baby."  I think he's the best, and I want everyone else to see how amazing he is too instead of seeing a list of things he can't do. 

They were adamant that I fill out these forms though.  It colored my whole day as it usually does.  It left me feeling heavy with despair, and I don't usually have a good fast way to shake it off and replace it with hope.  This song kind of helps though.

I was just thinking that if I, an adoptive mom, take these moments so hard, how much harder must it be for someone who didn't chose this, who wanted a "normal" baby. The bio moms must scream inside their heads at these moments, "Why can't my child do these things!!!"

Of course, he's worth it!  It was just a 'hard' that I didn't expect going into this adoption.  I thought I knew enough that this wouldn't hurt my heart.

I'll end my musings today with another part of the song (by Rachel Coleman) that leaves me with more hope.  Insert "Roman" for these random names.

"And Sammy will do what Sammy will do when Sammy is ready to do it

And Trevor will do what Trevor will do when Trevor is ready to do it

And Lucy will do what Lucy will do when Lucy is ready to do it

And they′ll do it in their own time

Yeah, they'll Shine"

Unexpected Crash

Before heading back to College Station at the end of spring break, Hannah headed out to meet some old friends for brunch, but called us soon after she left.  She was okay, but very shaken up, after a teenager hit her on the highway.  The girl almost changed lanes right into her.  Hannah honked, and it startled the other driver who then swerved too hard the other way, then over corrected again right perpendicularly into Hannah's car.  She is dealing with back pain now and a little over nervousness in the passenger seat.  The car is in the shop, and a wonderful angel of a lady got it all on her dash cam and stopped to help her.  We have the footage and so do the insurance companies.  It should be uncomplicated compared to how these things can be.

 

Bluebonnets for Our Littlest Texas Transplant

March 23rd is World Down Syndrome Day, and that is why I took these photos of Roman in his gold bowtie that was gifted to him by the DSA here in San Antonio when we adopted him.  (Blue and gold are the Down syndrome colors.)  The tie was way to big for him then, but now he is rocking it.  These bluebonnets were in my neighborhood if you can believe it.  I brought Brian along to be my assistant photographer and my official snake checker.  I am happy to report that there were no snakes to be seen...just this cutie pants.

Seriously, does it get any cuter than this?!  I, for one, am in love.

 

Hot Springs for Spring Break

It was a nine hour drive there, but on the way we crashed overnight at Hannah's pad at Aggieland.  Her roommates were already gone for spring break so we spread out air mattresses, cots, pallets, and a pack N play to squeeze all nine of us into her little apartment.  The second days drive was only 6.5 hours and it went by pretty quickly catching up with Hannah.  Roman is an excellent car rider as long as we can all listen to Baby Signing Time CDs on repeat for ever.  He doesn't sleep much or well, but he's happy and strapped in(translation = not getting into trouble.)

The first full day of vacation, we drove a couple hours away to check out a Benedictine Abbey in Subiaco.  We went to Mass, met some parishioners (one from Texas!) and spoke with a monk for a while.  We snapped a couple pictures and popped into the gift shop for homemade hot sauce that the monks make and sell.  We headed back after a picnic lunch in order to catch a reservation at Delucas for three pizza doughs with no table.  At this restaurant, they only take reservations for the dough, not the tables, so we had to get there earlier than our reservation and wait an hour or more for a table to eat the pizza at.  It was so very worth it.  It was amazing.  Our waiter was energetic and fun, and a little eccentric.  The owner came to our table and brought us free lasagna rolls and garlic bread as an apology for our wait.  The lasagna rolls were the absolute best.  

Subiaco Abbey

Waiting for the table...

He was a trooper despite two days of no naps, but he had to stay in the baby carrier.  No highchair would've worked.  So I ate with him tucked in here nice and comfy.

Day two was the botanical gardens (see below for more info).  We went to Bathhouse Brewery and had another huge wait for a table.  The restaurants are all very small there and apparently can't handle the visiting population.  Again the food was great, though not to top Delucas.

Day three the girls and I went to the oldest, continuous running bathhouse in Hot Springs called the Buckstaff Bathhouse.  We arrived at 7:30am.  The line was already growing and the place didn't open the doors until 8am.  Hannah held down the fort while Genna and I got coffees.  In the end the line was just long enough for us to walk to get coffees, bring them back and drink them before it was time to check in and fill out release forms.  However, that was only the beginning of our wait.  Once upstairs you are changed and put in another waiting room for several hours.  One by one we were eventually led into the back and experienced the old style baths minus the cold needle shower at the end. (They no longer offer it since COVID, but I didn't find out why.) Included was a mineral water tub soak, a hot towel wrap (plus a cold one for your face), a sitz bath, and a steam shower in a metal box with a hole for your head.

Day four was the final day and the day many had been waiting for...the pontoon rental!  It was an overcast and chilly day.  The oldest 5 kids loved it, but Roman and Bob were off and on.  Bob just got upset a couple of times about silly things, but overall enjoyed it.  Roman did not like going fast and was screaming during those parts.  He did like listening to music and being able to walk around with me holding onto his life jacket handle.  He also liked getting to "drive."  It was a four hour trip and we had no major disasters, so I guess it was a success.  Technically.  Though it didn't feel like it for me most of the time since I was on Roman duty the majority of it.

I let go of him for 1.5 seconds to snap this picture and everyone gasped.

One of Bob's pouting periods

Roman and I got in some good walks with bird watching and learning a few of the native trees and bushes with the help of Google Image.

Off the back porch/deck of our AirBnB:  Ducks, geese, turtles and all kinds of birds.  I love just walking out my back door and seeing all kinds of wildlife.

Isaac needed to do some school work and Roman needed a good nap after many missed ones since he barely sleeps in the car.  So I stayed home with them on Day 2, and the rest of the crew went to the botanical gardens in the area.  This was the highlight for a couple of the kids which surprised me.

 

Our Football Fan

That smile!

Roman is a big football fan, and he loved loved loved going to a real live Aggie football game at Kyle field back in November.  His daddy is really hoping it sticks since none of the other boys are super interested in football.

He is often found in this position when a game is on.

Here's a couple of pictures from his first Aggie game back in November. He had THE best outfit, and we had the best seats too.   He loved the band and all the noise!
 

"All of Me"

Isaac is playing "All of Me" by John Legend and Roman is acting all Ray Charles, but without the sunglasses.

 Yes, yes.  I am crying in this video.  Roman's therapist had changed his straw and cup (same formula) the day before.  He "could" drink out of it, but he was refusing it this particular evening.  We tried everything and he was just screaming and angry that he couldn't have his old straw cup.  When everyone had finished dinner and Isaac started playing the piano, I sat there next to him because Roman loves to "play" the piano with him.  Brian was videoing this because, of course, it is adorable and I was just thinking how exhausted I was from the struggle and how wonderful and very worth it Roman is.  They were tears of joy and struggle all mixed up.

He ended up drinking from the cup when he was calm and distracted by the piano.  We have since backed up and are working on that straw and cup in therapy and trying to push him, but not too much.  It's a very fine line.

Senior Night

I mentioned recently that Genevieve is super busy right now and rarely home. That has lent itself to a few illnesses. She had a stomach bug that many people in the basketball team also had. And last week she was home with a fever and a sore throat that my mommy instincts led me to take her to get a strep test which was positive.  When she started to get sick she was panicking that she was going to miss her senior night for basketball. The last home game for seniors they do a special presentation and they give them a personalized basketball, team photos framed, and a basket of goodies that the teammates collect.  

Luckily we got those antibiotics just in the nick of time for her to be allowed to go back to school Friday afternoon so she could be a part of her senior night. However she had missed several days of practice, had been in bed, and was very weak still.  But Genevieve has all kinds of drive and motivation, and she played almost the entire game with a beet red face.  It was a good game, and I'm sad for the season to be ending.  I only have one more that's interested in basketball, Isaac and Judah are playing baseball this spring.  I don't have anything against baseball but it's just not as exciting to watch as basketball and the games are so very long.  Roman really enjoyed watching basketball all season and I'm not sure how he'll feel about baseball since it's harder to see what's happening and much slower.  He loves all the action and all the noise of a basketball game.

Back to Genna's night, her coaches said that she was "tenacious with a smile" which is so very true!  Her friends in the stands made cut outs of her and some of the other seniors and put them on Popsicle sticks which was kind of adorable.